Last Free Man

Congrats to us!

We had an amazing wedding, honeymoon, reception all rolled into a whirlwind three weeks. I would like to thank all involved but especially my beautiful bride Tanya for pretty much planning/initializing the whole affair. I felt more like the bride as everything unfolded around me perfectly while Tanya with pencil in-ear ran about planning.  Either way I look to a brighter future with the true love of my life for many years to come!

Brandon and Tanya met first online in the last summer of 2005 and then in person at the UGA vs. South Carolina game on Saturday, September 20^th, 2005. Yes, something good actually did come out of myspace.com: the union of these two crazy kids!

Brandon opened up Tanya’s world to online gaming and all-things-techie, spicy food, photography and reptiles of all varieties. Tanya exposed Brandon to the wines of the world, the making of sketch comedy, the healing powers of a neti-pot and why ninety-nine percent of their laundry should always be washed in cold, on the gentle cycle.

Together they share a passion for writing, traveling and being lazy near sincere stretches of water with their child/dog Frosty (a very loving Maltese) by their side.

They have supported each other through several tragedies that have occurred on both sides of their families and feel they’ve come out stronger, wiser and more compassionate on the other side.

Bliss at Sea

First Met in Person: Saturday, September 10, 2005

First Date: Friday, November 25, 2005

Brandon Proposed Marriage to Tanya: Friday, November 26, 2010

Tanya was a child of the seventies and eighties, loving the music from then and now the edgy sounds of today as well. She’s had a career at WSB-TV since 1998 with a truly amazing group of broadcast professionals. Tanya also delights in the voice over work she does and loves writing like there’s no tomorrow! She writes a blog for Emory Healthcare’s “Advancing Your Health-Weight Management” site, has a deep passion for her personal blog www.LifestyleSophisticate.com and also can’t live without her practice of Hatha Yoga and regular meditation. Spending quality time with dear friends and amazing family are things Tanya simply can’t get enough of. Fabulous fashion, blogging, synchronized swimming, making jewelry, reading and travel are among some of the other things that Tanya really enjoys!

Contrary to popular belief, Brandon is actually not the inventor of the Atari game system. He is, however, the best at gaming in the universe. That much is true (that is, at least, what Tanya will tell you.) Born with a joystick in his hand and HTML in his heart, Brandon went through the ranks of the Boy Scouts to be a well-rounded outdoorsman, animal lover, cook, photographer, videographer and computer whiz. Brandon has enjoyed a stellar full-time career with Astro Contractors, Inc. since 1996 and was made partner in 2011. Brandon has been committed to blogging on his site www.lastfreeman.com for several years, chronicling every day of his life in rich prose and photography. He’s even sold some of his video footage professionally for documentaries! When Brandon isn’t tearing apart an old CPU he enjoys researching early model Russian cameras, US History, politics and kicking back to take in a movie at home.

The happy couple have many furry (and some scaly) children! Frosty, the Maltese, is the animal matriarch of the household. Fabiola and Mr. Yunioshi are their two domestic, feisty kitties and Winston Churchill is their very wild and often vocal cat that prefers outside living. A fairly old boa constrictor enjoys his own private glass condo right down from the two very large tortoises Brandon has raised from just after they were first born. Right now the smallest children in their brood are their three clown fish, two sea anemones, several hermit crabs, the lone brittle star fish and one very old peppermint shrimp that share their bedroom.

 

 

Give thanks

 
This has not been the easiest of decades, and more often than not we have been treated to tragedy and bad news economically and personally during what was supposed to be the future, the year 2000... I am however thankful that my family is whole and healthy. That there is a little glimmer of freedom rising up against the tyranny this country is under. That perhaps in the darkest of days the dawn still nears...

 

Shawn's Journey

 
 

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/shawnmcgill

On Tuesday, May 18th, 2010, Shawn was at work just as he was every day. At some point he sat down to take a break and suddenly realized he couldn't control his hands, especially his left hand. He fell over and had to be helped back up as it became apparent that he couldn't use his arms to push himself back to his previous sitting position. After that, Shawn was rushed to Wellstar Kennestone Hospital's ER where he was given a CT scan and an MRI. The CT scan came back normal but the MRI seemed to reveal a bulging disk in his neck. Shawn was in a great deal of pain and by this point had no feeling in the entire left side of his body and only about 25% control over the right side of his body. I feel compelled to take a moment to express how impressed we were with everyone in the ER at Kennestone. Every single professional we came in contact with was caring, concerned and went out of their way to make sure we knew exactly what was going on and that we were comfortable while we waited for the latest updates.

Although Shawn did indeed have a bulging disk, we learned later that night after further diagnosis that he had Guillain-Barre syndrome and would immediately be admitted to the ICU as this was something much more serious than a bulging disk in his neck. While in the ER, Shawn had been complaining of having difficulty breathing. This made perfect sense given his new diagnosis as GBS is sometimes accompanied by this serious symptom.      

 On Thursday, May 20th, Shawn's breathing had become so difficult that he was sedated and placed on a respirator. His lungs were in good condition, however, the muscles surrounding them responsible for making the chest work properly had become weaker and weaker. He's now resting & recovering in the ICU at Kennestone now, where he will be for at least the next month. His care-givers there are among the best and we are just grateful for the quick diagnosis of GBS as the quicker the diagnosis and the quicker the treatment, the better the prognosis tends to be.

*Guillain–Barré syndrome (GBS) is an acute inflammatory demyelinating polyneuropathy (AIDP), an autoimmune disorder affecting the peripheral nervous system, usually triggered by an acute infectious process. The syndrome was named after the French physicians Guillain, Barré and Strohl, who were the first to describe it in 1916. It is sometimes called Landry's paralysis, after the French physician who first described a variant of it in 1859. It is included in the wider group of peripheral neuropathies. There are several types of GBS, but unless otherwise stated, GBS refers to the most common form, AIDP. GBS is rare and has an incidence of 1 or 2 people per 100,000. It is frequently severe and usually exhibits as an ascending paralysis noted by weakness in the legs that spreads to the upper limbs and the face along with complete loss of deep tendon reflexes. With prompt treatment by plasmapheresis or intravenous immunoglobulins and supportive care, the majority of patients will regain full functional capacity. However, death may occur if severe pulmonary complications and autonomic nervous system problems are present. Guillain-Barré is one of the leading causes of non-trauma-induced paralysis in the world.

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/shawnmcgill

A mysterious God indeed

This week we were all shocked by the tragic loss of friend's father. Taken was he like so many too early it almost defies explanation in a world of order why things like this happen.

My entire childhood was no different, the cowboys always had it right with their ancient knowledge of "the good die young." I'm not the most religious guy you'll find but I feel a certain connection to God and the spirituality of good. I think love, and decency play a key roll in making the human spirit different than that of beast.

This is what makes us special in the universe, this is our "soul." Why then if there is a great and loving, fearful even God does he take from us the best, the kind, the decent? I have struggled with this riddle my whole life and the small bit of comfort I find is the following theory:

God wants to challenge us to be better. To be human, to be different, we were born with original sin and the ability to choose a path. Humans are often at a crossroads with the devil, and but a few choose to turn back and take a righteous path, most falter and toil in simple evils that consume their entire lives.  Only a few...  Therefore by taking the good early, we are faced with the reality of just how rare life is in this universe, we are a dim candlelight in the cosmos...  Life is a precious drop of rain in the desert of space. 

The evil are left among us to remind us to rise above, be better and turn the other cheek, cast not stones.  The lessons of our short history here are the greatest teachers of just how magnificent life is, and how just by knowing someone for even the smallest of journeys, they can make a great impact on our being.  The true way of honoring the good, is to live on in that same great tradition that they set out.  The quest is the quest they would say in Doctor Who...

Summerszcool Economics 101

Summerszcool tour started off this Year in beta at the Lakewood amphitheater the classic Buffett Atlanta experience.  Many years I had spent summers in the cheap lawn seats watching people pee in  popcorn bags and fight with their drunk 15 year old girlfriends.  The older we got and the more lucrative our careers became however moved us steadily inward closer and closer to the stage.  Despite Eric actually winning a web contest one time when no one knew what the web was, we had never gotten all that close to the stage, Eric of course has been on the stage, and participated in a number with Buffett.  This year was different however as the ticket speculators and live nation itself were struggling to get rid of the newly priced 160.00 level of seating...

Late yesterday golden tickets were flooding ebay, craigs list and the live nation web site.  It would appear that the economy was so bad or perceived to be so bad that many were not eager to spend close to $500 for a night at Lakewood with Buffett.  That is where or luck came in, as we had all but given up on the Summerszcool this year.  At the last minute close to 16:00 we scored VIP D seats at 4 rows from the stage for face value in an empty row...  Buffett that close and personal is a rare treat indeed, the row was empty and the crowd was sparce.  The parking lot maniacs were even very subdued.  It was a sad sight to behold when the lot has nary a gorilla pirate or stray boob.  Off lot parking soared to $30 but the guys selling lots were dealing, it seems the economy has cast its shadow over Margaritaville just as it has over every industry.  

Those who could, or would afford were treated to 3 new tour songs and a closing wild card of "Yellow Submarine."  One of the new tour favorites was actually an ode to this declining economy of ours and quite humorous at times, as we all sung together about the hardships of money with: "Something to drink about." All in all it was a standard Lakewood night with crazy hood folks tomfoolery, philly cheese bathrooms, fighting with amiga owners over Mac's ball and skipper pimping with street brokers.  We capped off at Waffle just to seal the deal and called another successful Buffett show to a close. 

    

Conclusion:  The tour is great this year and highly recommended, the new stage complete some great live beach scenes and interactive camera features make it fun.  The music is always great as the golden 10 were obviously sung, and the extreme ticket prices plus service fee may make a front row dream come true for some.  Otherwise perhaps economics class is truly in session at summerszcool this year...

Media (I went low profile only iphone so no video just stills, rare indeed...)

Audioboo from the opener

Photos from the 4th row

Pollen hammer!

Yes folks it's that time of year again spring. Can I actually be so negative as to wax ugly on the virgin, flowerest laden season of all? Why yes I can, pull up a stool and let's hate on some spring! This is that time of year when the air is full of hope and blossoms and tree sperm! Oh my yes with each death rattled breath I take I get natures fantastic free cum shot to the sinus. The older I get it seems the more pills, ointments and voodoo rituals I require in order to prop up during this mating season of ours. This year for instance I was up at 3 am eating cereal, and drinking beer at 10 am while driving to work, as my system was so shocked by the DST government mandate. The government you ask? Yes I blame my sinal stress syndrome on the Obama administration. Where's my tarp or bail out I need a new hanky, hachhhoo!! 

This early winter/late spring thing we have going here must be the reason for the new flavor of Bradford pear that is springing up. You see what I did there, that was a pun, the lowest comedy denominator, I would like to thank Zrytec, claritin, and viagara for that lack of comedic justice, spring will kill me you see?! Yes the Bradford pears are a changing this year, evolving perhaps. All those sub-prime real estate installs have lead to a revolt! This year instead of the normal cheap skating rink harlot perfume smell, we were blessed with a haughty mix of old steak, with a light mushroomy  finish. I actually thought I left a steak somewhere all this week as I was "taking the air..." 

(Every spring I take a boar out for a ride, although no animals were harmed in the making of this blog, animals were annoying me and animals may have had rocks thrown at them.)

Spring is also that season when all the vitamin D-tards (not a pun a play on words, thanks drug cocktail) are out in full force. You know these people, they complain about myths like skin cancer and melanoma all winter, and as soon as it gets springy out they make you log off and to outside. If you resist, you get the old mom bit, the go outside and play... Of course when you go out into this sperm infested atmosphere you get assaulted by mating squirrels, you see they are extra aggressive this time of year. Best stay indoors I say! College basketball, St. Patricks day, May day, there are an endless spree of hallmarxist created holidays and distractions to keep you busy and your mind off of the real truth. 

Yes the real truth is that spring is here, and you are one year closer to dying and becoming fertilizer for next springs flowers. Oh no you di-iant oh yes I di-id, take that spring! This was all done mobile, while outside taking the air... Any annomalies in spelling or otherwise are due to tired thumbs and the economy.  Yes every sentance I hear these days ends with "the economy" so I'm going to be shabby chic and get with the cool poor people.

Mobile post 03/11/2009 17:00 Brandon A. Freeman

I have basically become a middle-aged woman at this point...

I don't know if it's the water or this new puppy in my life, but I have become a little old lady at this point in my life.  I think the latter may be the actual reason: the fluffy poof that is "Frosty" the Maltese dog.  My girlfriend initially wanted an accessory/pocket puppy, I wanted nothing to do with it so I played the dead dog card as long as I could.  I finally relented and we got a tiny 6 lb puppy dog poof thing, I wasn't ever a small dog person but my inner old lady seems to be coming out.  Coming from a large dog history of over 13 years this transition has been difficult to say the least.

I cringe when I think about the changes that have occurred in my dog husbandry habits over the past six months, especially when compared to what they were with Rhino.  Yes Rhino a proud monstrous dog of war, weighing in at 95 lbs and 2000 years genes worth of pure kill.  This dog and I would proudly storm the mountain at break-neck speeds fully "tongue out" attacking every creature and trail we found.  We never stopped for anything except injury or potential death, we killed things, ate sticks and made a general nuisance of ourselves.  Nowadays I find myself walking the poof at a break neck 23 min mile, with a Burberry leash and collar, oh and if it's wet we better stay off the leaves, cant have little mitten poofs getting damp, that might require a detangler.  Yes a detangler... In the old days a detangler was pulling the briars or possums off Rhino while we both laughed at the battle with roguish grins.

Then the grooming, yes the current situation involves shampoos, conditioners, blow dryers and fluff outs.  When I was a man and did manish things with my hell beast, we would gladly hit the hose up in the front yard and revel in the mud and guts being washed off each other as we spilled OUR beers.  It won't be much longer before this fluff-ball poof weasel needs to be brushed and clipped weekly as he fills out his full coat of poof.  I can see myself already wearing a pink apron and grooming this pocket fluff while the View is on in the background.

The one interesting development that has come from this transition to middle-aged womanhood that I am experiencing, other than the menopause is a heightened sensory perception.  This all started when we would go on our daily bathroom walks in the backyard.  When I would walk Rhino he would shoot off into the woods somewhere far away, hopefully on neighbors property and do his worst.  I would hardly have to listen at all to make sure he went.  The huge waste of a days worth of killing and burying things would hit the forest floor with such audio clarity there was no doubt that it was over.  Now of course things are a bit different, after pleading with the floof to "please go potty" he saunters off to the edge of the grass where I can't really see him and gingerly squats.  Much like a well tuned ninja my senses have become so sharpened I can now actually hear his itsy-bitsy rabbit droppings occur.  So the ninja skill leveling I appreciate certainly, but still...

To watch me tear around the house playing silly chase games and throwing numerous stuffed animals to this guinea pig of dogs is a sad sight to behold.  I really should start wearing ball gowns and drink mint juleps at this point.  Rhino would be rolling in his hand dug grave (that he would have gladly helped dig, he was that bad ass.)  I have a conclusion of sorts, this is a rebound dog situation!  I don't actually like being a lady boy like this, I don't even like sweater shopping!  This is the only explanation.  This is certainly a rebound dog...  Whew I feel better, gotta go brush the puppy's teeth now!

Fall

My favorite season has descended upon us, the dark and dreary days of Fall. Autumn, harvest time, whichever you prefer this is the time of year when nature spends it's fruit and dies back for the coming Winter. I'm not sure why Fall is so great, I prefer cooler weather and the changing foliage is a welcome sight after a brutal hot August. Maybe there is a little pagan in me that yearns for Samhain and old Halloweds eve... Either way the seasons are changing and that means my lifestyle is changing.

The bog I so love is now growing slower and getting dormant, while the pond fills with pine needles. The dog is poofing out his winter coat and burrowing more as the house cools. This is also the MMO season because now that it's cold and wet outside all the time, 20 million of us have additional reasons to be in game.

It won't be long until the banana growing season ends and the massive breakdown occurs, requiring either storage or protection from the cold.

I wonder what this winter holds? I can almost smell frost in the air on these cool mornings as the real cold is only just a few weeks away...

Vista hate and Obama love...

 

I have had the pleasure the last day or so of "downgrading" 8 workstations OS. I say downgrading because it's true, Vista business down to Windows XP is truly backasswadrsly thinking. The more I stumble through this old install procedure which I have mostly forgot due to the fact that I have been fully Vista since release, the more I draw parallels between another stupid movement afoot... Read on.

The yummy directx 10, 64bit, gorgeousness that is the Windows Vista OS has been damn nearly ruined by the idiots of this country.  Yes the slow meager PC users still able to make do with 64mb of ram and an integrated video solution I say pfft to you all.  This is the same exact thought process that has now propped up what looks to be the first dictator of this country Barack Hussein Obama.  The same process or lack of insight that led to the mass Vista hate, has led to mass God-making of a barely 3 year veteran of the senate, with nothing more than a few catch phrases and lots of ultra liberal "change..."

What is it about humanity that makes us so fickle?  So apt at being slaves?  Why do the majority of Americans desire to be lead around by the nose by their governments, friends and media?  I get truly angry when I hear fools professing their hate for Vista with no more reason than just the hype.  I have challenged many people I have overheard the last few months; voting for Obama and hating Vista.  The blank stares and brook trout face are the same, "give me one reason why!?"  The answer with mouth breathing pause is always the same:  "Vista sucks" or "Obama change"

 I think this current herd mentality that has infected our society will be what the historians refer to as the turning point in our great republic that led to the eventual implosion of the whole "liberty" trend.  So go on America, Vote for obama, and hate on Vista to quote Chevy Chase: "you ignorant slut..." 

Gas wars...

Week three of the gas crisis is over now and possibly the worst of all. The lack of gas coming from the gulf area put a kink in the system and now it has officially rolled in. This lack of supply has coupled with a serious flaw in human nature and now the perfect gas storm is upon us.

This flaw I speak of is the herd mentality most humans suffer from. For some reason when people see others gathering they chime on in, creating massive lines of stupidity. I remember several people at the end of the wii line not being completly certain at what the que was about. People love lines and crisis, and my real fear is that when the gas supply actually returns, people will be so paranoid about riding around with a half tank that this current shortage will go on for many more months.

So the solution may rely on our populous actually maturing a little more than it's ready for. Maybe not going out 5 times a day for meaningless trips, and filling up when you have a 1/4 tank. This is another mobile for now post...

Mobile post Brandon A. Freeman 09282008 0932

Mobile, for now...

There is an apparent gas supply issue going on in Cobb County, perhaps metro wide right now. I was running a pretty steady half tank all weekend, not noticing the storm brewing around me.  All weekend I had sort of been aware of the lines and flurry around the gas stations, but I just figured it was another late week gas panic.  Last night as I went to the lake I started to get a little nervous as my range started showing 50 miles and every gas station I passed was empty. 

So I figured the trucks would run into the night and I would beat the curve and head out crazy early this morning with my 4o miles of range and fill up.  Wrong.  I went all the way to Windy Hill on 41 with out finding a single gas station with fuel.  Now I am one of those jerks I laugh at panicking about gas for Monday.  I am seriously considering lawnmower gas at this point...

My tank presently sits at about a gallon I figure and my range will only tell me low, this is not the time to be out searching for gas.  I really don't want to do any siphoning of other vehicles, I had my fill of gas mouthfuls over the years of lawn maintenance and I am too old for that.  So I Parked me vehicle and can only hope 05:00 Monday will bring the gas genie to Cobb.  This running out of gas thing is completely new phenomena for me and I don't like the feeling one bit, coming from a life long Boy Scout motto of: "be prepared" I'm stressed just knowing my tank is empty.  If this is the future of energy in this world we better prepare for an "Ice Pirates-like" culture because this anxiety would surely make the meek quite fierce indeed...

Mobile post 09212008 09:00 Brandon A. freeman

ARRRRRRR!

(Back hair, shoulder hair, hair hair, this is pirate)

Another famous mobile post, I wasjust reminded; yes me the king of piratedness, that today is in fact: TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY!  No time no wine for long explanations, you talk to everyone like a pirate today, optionally pillage and rape them as well.  I forgot yes fail...  I did build a web page while driving, just now thats kind of piratey arrrrr...

More pirate:

Archetype of Parrothead

September 19 the only holiday

• Lasses
• Smuggling!
• Treasure Map!
• Booty!

Brandon A. Freeman Mobile post 09192008 10:32

Back to basic

Yet another week ends and I find myself back in the bog. This was a time travel sort of week with lots of old OS support. I worked on several classics including Windows 98, Windows 2000, and some old ad-hoc 33.6 modems. This really took me back...

I remember those good old days of fighting for every single bps when a new modem version came out. The Internet seemed much more mysterious back then, (hell magical even) that is if you could even get it to work. Even before the actual world wide web we would run around various BB systems and lame around with 9600 baud modems. I really do miss that old handshake tone, or the crunchy data sounds, and the wonderful 56k bong bong tone. Nowadays the stupid Internet always works and pounds in at 12mbps...

I can remember wanting to play Doom so bad with the microscopic online gaming community, that we would actually stretch phone cords into our bedrooms and dial into each others PCs through dial up networking to deathmatch! That was serious hacking right there, as my mom would pick up a receiver and offline we'd go!  My fondest (early) online memories were always bent around trying to play games. I actually have digital memories that strike real emotions from online game events, I think this is something new to our collective evolution as we get more virtual.

Still though there is something special about the old days of modem gaming like the heat network, gamespy, and pick up games of Quake. I do enjoy my friends in the mmo world certainly, but they never really had to work to get there. I remember re-wiring an entire house in cat5 cable just to shave a little interference off my phone line. It wasn't so my connection would get faster to browse the Internet, oh no it was to lessen my ping rate to give me an advantage. You see, back in those days guys with a low ping were almost considered cheaters and we hated them, we called them LPB... Usage: "ugh I just got pwned by some LPB" this meant someone with a better connection blew you away and you were jealous! Oh yeah we invented pwned back then too not those lamers on steam accounts in 2004, we were putting that in peoples faces in Quake I way back in 96...

I guess what I'm rambling on about is the fact that the golden age for me at least, will always be the late 90's... I loved troubleshooting Windows errors, video drivers, and slow modems. So it was pretty cool this week to travel back to lamer'vile and work on some old OS issues. I think I may rebuild my old PIII pwnage machine with Win98se and put it right back to it's original 1997 golden state, perhaps I will call it the legacy project!

Mobile post. Brandon Freeman

Rocks mostly

Basically this final day we opted for some desert rock hopping. We headed out the Valley of Fire, a place which sounds very much like a World of Warcraft zone. It was hot, dry, and full of different rocks. Lots of rocks, in fact there were rocks that dinosaurs probably hiked their legs on! It felt well over 100 plus as the low elevation made the temperatures hostile at best. It got so hot towards the end of our 4 hours in this hell on earth that we opted for some " in car photography..."

Another notable encounter was the bizarre rock stacks we kept running into along the way. It got very Blair Witchy as we approached and noticed the weird little stacks. I opted to make my own stack in a sort of rock protest. All things considered I actually enjoyed my time in the desert maybe more than my nights in the casino.

Magic and other mayhem

Happy birthday to Erc, at least that was how the day started out. We joked throughout the day that this was the best birthday I had ever had... The irony was we went hiking/scrambling at Red Rock Canyon all day. That was then followed by the VIP Penn and Teller show, which featured a meet and greet... We then gambled away most of the night with me winning constantly.

I felt bad, because I met magicians, scrambled boulders, and won jackpots... So I guess I really do owe my brother another nearly 30 birthday party!

Penn and Teller killed as I thought they would with a perfect mix of satire and classic magic topped with some great politics. These guys are true masters of the dark arts and shouldn't be missed. They were actuaaly cool enough to talk to fans for a little while, and I actually spoke with Teller, I would have to say it was spooky indeed talking with someone who has been silent for 30 years. Penn was jovial mammoth of a man with a great heart, when I asked he revealed to me the secret of his one red finger nail. I will take it to my grave certainly...

Dive bars and such...

More from my new series of iPhone only blog attempts. Last night was the old casino crawl evening, we walked all the way up the strip checking out the latest technology. It was Friday night so the scene was pretty much standard Vegas, lots of escort looking girls in heels so high they could easily be toppled by the minimalist of drinks. It's always hard to tell in Vegas who is just a hot girl it who is just working... I always assume the latter.

We had some Kobe beef hot dogs for dinner, in honor of Diddy we saved one much like how gang members pour one out for their homies. After seeing all the sex and lights of the strip we moved on to the less traveled side of Vegas, the dive casino scene.

We settled into a place called terrible's the name tells you exactly what to expect. This was true dive complete with worn carpet paths, greasy guards, and stabbings every Saturday night. We went for the video poker bar, just for the sake of people watching and story gathering. You always here the best stories at the video poker bar, there is just a sorry kind of vibe there. This evening we were mostly left alone although the wedding singer-ish entertainer was a blast.

This Terrible's entertainer was just that, his specialty was mixing bad 80's rock ballads with a karaoke like monotone. He also was apparently under contract to mention various casino amenities during and after the song. Yes example: "welcome to the hotel California," pause "guys we have a great hotel upstairs at Terrible's... Classic win was obtained around 02:00 when this mega-tainer started lightly sexually harassing the crowd. This of course lead to the adult balloon animals that followed his advances. This sort of thing just isn't available on the strip, that's why sometimes you just gotta dive!

It's Vegas time!

Yes another live hard die young weekend is upon us. Forgive the odd format here I packed ultra light and I am currently attempting the famed mobile blogging! This is going to be a crash course in cheap sushi, magicians, dive casinos, death valleys and lots of sweaty balled male bonding. This is Erc's last none 30 birthday and we are gonna party live like it's 75 and we're in Queen. Except all the gay stuff, all the sex, drugs, and rock n roll yes, butt sex no. So yeah follow our journey into certain doom if you dare...

Http://www.drivingandblogging.com

The reality is we'll probably play video poker at " Terrible's" go to bed at 20:00, and watch the Golden Girls... But hey you won't know if you don't watch, I'm ouuuut!

The pyro award goes to...

Uncle George!  The pyrotechnic of the year!  This years fireworks went off without a hitch, with near perfect accuracy and less collateral damage as usual.  The only irritation to speak of was the awful pontooners ghetto boating around blasting Justin Timberlaoow...  I usually film these things just for Uncle George's post show forensics, that and just in case we get the odd crowd mortar, this year not so.  Not even a single emergency room visit was had!  To enjoy some great fireworks all one has to do is click the links below, it is really that simple!  Don't forget to hit the high quality link to the video once the page loads, otherwise your just teh nub!

Uncle George's fireworks fantastico!

Uncle George's fireworks fantastico finale!

Aftermath...

We survived Buffett's 25th show in Atlanta...

I'm really not that bad of a guy...

I got banned again this time on Nike+ while using an image I shot, created, and own.  I must have a copyright kick me sign on this week.  Kind of makes all those millions of gigs of data I pirated feel rather justified.  The image that got me was my own character the "behavior monitor" from the half bottle of Bacardi night.  When will it end...

Dear Nike+ User,

Nike values the creativity and individuality of Nike+ users, and encourages you to enjoy the Nike+ website, and to freely express yourself here through words and pictures, subject to our Terms and Conditions.

http://www.nike.com/renov/nikestore/us/v1/us/en/info/privacy.jsp?item=forumterms

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Getting yelled at, at work, in a job that's not mine...

Oh this is the tale of all tales!  A quick story so ironic and funny I had to tell the world, the setting is micro center.  In case you don't know micro center is the only 80's ghetto looking computer store left in the metro Atlanta area, it is horrifically expensive and full of junk, but when you gotta get a stick of ram to fix a system at 15:30 ON Friday they are open.  So I was there.  Having spent most of the day hovering over construction site porta johns, feeling a little feverish, and generally just over it, I was grumpy.  So deal. 

I find myself shopping for some WiFi antennas to bring an ad-hoc link together peer to peer for some RS485 panel linking, blah blah nerd stuff.  As I am wading through the dusty boxes of old 80211 swag, I notice an Indian gentlemen staring daggers at me from across the way.  I'm thinking to myself Ugh no, no, no, not today.  Everyone thinks I work at this shit store when I go there for some reason, I think it's subtle racism: "nerdy white guy, with 3 phones, pda, psp, and dark rims..."  Either way my lingering friend is making his way over slowly and doing that I need help stare, mouth open, hands out...  I will now treat you to the full conversation as it happened in store, the names have been changed to protect the innocent:

• Random guy: Hey I waash looking for the dx200 vershon of this, the one listed in shales brochures.
• Me: I don't know (walks away)
• Random guy: Sir, sir!
• Me: (walks further away)
• Random guy: Exscushe me shirt!
• Me: (walks further away, yet still)
• Random guy: (catches up, out of breathe) (panting) Why doo you not help me!  I am need of help!
• Me: Look man...
• Random guy: (interrupts) I am the cushtomer why do you treat me fish way!
• Me: (raising eyebrow) K, I am just another douche bag walking around this place, OK!
• Actual employee: (An old dried up lifer employee speaks up across the row) HEY HEY! This is not how we do things here! (he continues, yelling at me...)  This is our customer and no matter how busy we are, we stop, and if you remember page 12 of the employee handbook blah blah, (continues on about rules...)

Me: (interrupting both /r/tards) I don't work here!  So you're both going to have to accept that, and move on! Now bugger off, I have some overpriced shit to purchase, buhbye! (walks away, ...and scene!)

Yes, I was yelled at by a manager of a sub par store, for doing a poor job, that I don't even have.  You just have to laugh, and I did.  I wasn't the least bit angry, rather I felt like this was an interesting view into the rare world of mass hysteria.  For about 2 seconds I actually had a moment of panic when I thought maybe some space time lapse or parallel universe had unfolded and I was working there, and this was my reality.  Then I realized it was all just a grand mistake, thank God I don't work at Micro Center.  Thank God I dig ditches for a living!  ...and scene!

King Tut of the Neti pots...

I have been getting well over 10 or 15 requests a day on Google searches for a silly post I made one night with a netty pot.  Or is it neti pot?  Perhaps even netti pot, nettie pot, or netia pot.  You see what I am doing there.  Yes indexing even more traffic merely by mentioning some ancient nasal technology.  With pollen season in full bloom and Dr. Oz curing everything from genital warts to mild sinus congestion with a netty pot I suppose I may have hit Google gold with my seemingly silly sinus post.  Lets go for more nasal networking shall we!

Nasal irrigation is an ancient Ayurvedic technique known as Jala neti, which literally means nasal cleansing with water in Sanskrit, where the practitioner uses a neti pot to perform the irrigation. Because modern medicine has long supported the use of nasal irrigation to clear sinuses and prevent sinus and nasal conditions, physicians also accept Jala neti as simply one type of nasal irrigation, which can be performed using a neti pot or syringe.

Jala neti, though relatively less known in Western culture, is a common practice in parts of India and other areas in South East Asia, performed as routinely as brushing one's teeth using a toothbrush. It is performed daily, usually as the first thing in the morning with other cleansing practices. It may also be performed at the end of the day if one works or lives in a dusty or polluted environment. When dealing with problems of congestion it can be performed up to four times a day.

I think that about covers it, a neti pot is basically a douche for your nose.  If you're too cheap to go to the doctor, or the meth labs have run you out of real sudafed, you can hook this thing up and flush most of the crap right out of your skull.  I personally think it burns like hell, and reminds me of doing cocaine mixed with glass, but hey, I didn't become the official king tut of the netty pots by whining did I?  Snort!

The sensational 12 hits a day original post:

King tut of the netty pots

Deadbear restoration project 1.0

 

I would now like to present the deadbear restoration project!  Thousands of wild monkeys on typewriters are rewriting code, throwing poop and rebuilding index files!  Stay tuned to the I Go Back section, your source for up to the minute updates on the process of bringing the deadbear back to life!  Live after death indeed!

Episode one:  My pride and joy from about 1997-2002 was not a random slew of blonde girls with great assets.  No it was a simple webpage I proudly designed and built by hand.  I took great care to fully write each area of the site using only notepad, the main reason was to help me build skills in a soon to be web infiltrated world.  So it wasn't unusual for me to happily slave away for hours on this site, optimizing code, clearing out redundancies and making sure every tag (</P>) got terminated!  Continued...

Journey back to 1950

I have been radio silent lately, email unaware, and blogless.  This is mainly due to my time travel back to 1950.  Virtually at least, I have been working a job for a major bottle company which has changed little in the last 50 years of proud service.  I too was swept up into this world of dark smoky break rooms and outlawed cell phones.  The digital world is far from this turn of the century style factory, but if you look hard enough you can see small glimmers of technology creeping into the process around every turn.  I was there to bring a few servers in and do my part, to infect this factory with our brand of modernization.

The glass production process has not changed much in the last 100 years or so.  You take some sand with a high silica base, heat it up to 2400F, make a giant deadly ball out of it, then let it hang from the ceiling as various machines beat the shit out of it like taffy.  As this giant molten glass stream begins to come down it is dropped into molds that slam it, form it and cut it, all of this done with precise titanium cast molds.  Then wham-o! You have standing before you a perfectly shaped 600-800f glowing red bottle.  This bottle is then quickly whizzed down the line into a very long trough system so that it maintains its heat and slowly cools.  If it cools too fast its brittle, too slow and it cracks. 

This process requires an insane amount of moving parts, and heat, which in turn require an equally insane amount of grease to keep pistons from eating themselves alive.  This is all done at ambient room temperatures of 105-145f.  So when a brave lineman is tending the grease mop, he is actually slathering black oily stuff all over very hot moving parts, which then creates a fantastic steamy grease cloud that rises up.  The cloud of doom then cools and rains down a fine, black acid rain that coats every noun in the building.

Why am I telling you all this?  Mostly this is my excuse for not handling my multitude of digital diversions.  I have achieved levels of filthy that can only be imagined while cabling and setting up various security nodes in this factory that time forgot.  This is heavy industrial, something my polo shirt wearing ass hasn't been exposed to in almost 12 years.  Just for fun I thought I might list some of the extreme levels of dirt/grime I have encountered:

• One of the first forays into filth that I got right off the bat was while I was up on a lift with my bondage suit on (safety not sexy.)  As it turns out they have not dusted the upper beams of this place in 50 years or so.  When I was rearranging some cables I got a shirt full of ancient cigarette, black oil, diesel, carbon remnant dust!  It was sticky and a bit tangy!  One beam undisturbed had a dust stack about 2" deep.
• While the lift was positioned very high up, over a diesel powered positive air flow machine the size of a small trailer, I was treated to several bong full equivalent doses of quad exhausted spent diesel fuel.  That is the kind of stuff that coats your lungs with a rainbowy squirminess and fills your head with unclean visions and native American shit, (I would have said Indian but I didn't want the curry reference to stick) whoa fresh air stat!
• While hammer drilling the exterior brick from 1955, I received the old gutter full of pine pollen piss in the face move.  This was chalky with a mild vision impairment finish.
• I leaned up against a pole and when I unleaned I left a mirror image of myself in the poles grease layer...  On the same note I put my hand into a sharp piece of rusty sheet metal which left me with an unusual black cut that won't heal and whispers to me at night.  It is also itchy in the morning only.  Never healing it has become a divining rod of sorts.
• While under a small roof trying to drill out of the rain, I noticed the rain was sticky and burning my skin.  Hmm I thought unusual but not completely out of character.  For some reason later I noticed I was covered in a rusty rain marinade that was comprised of the rust from the overhang coupled with the now saturated diesel fumes from a process motor.  That is quite a healthy coating of iron oxide and acidic carbon creating a burning mess.  In my further insanity, while driving out I took my glasses off and licked the arm, it burned my tongue like the 32nd "Mike and Ike" will.

I know I'm rambling but my mind is full of carbon monoxide, silica and the mystery smell.  My lungs are full of black oily residue. My body is broken, sore and tired.  My fingers should probably be sheared off at this point, they are black and gross, perhaps I could grow some better ones.  I will have to say, This little jaunt back in time has really opened my eyes to just how dirty one can get, it feels kind of good to work this hard and get this dirty.  I had to change my underwear rotation agenda up a day just to compensate, and that's good for everyone.

Related filth: Dumpster Safari Journal.

Traffic solution

The traffic filled life we all find ourselves in has taken its toll on my writings as of late.  It is a pun of sort that I start with here, toll.  After another week in Atlanta with 3 separate days of overturned tractor trailers and wrong way illegal aliens I have made several conclusions.  Now that downtown traffic gets heavy 06:30 on thanks to the low-bidding minority traffic engineer's closing of several major exits, (think 10/14th street,) traffic is possibly more hellish than ever in Atlanta. 

That being said, there simply isn't enough room for everyone in Atlanta everyday, and there certainly isn't room for a fantastic wreck every morning pre-dawn.  The real problem is once you have yourself a merry little accident on the interstate it takes well over 2 hours minimum for the slow minded government agents to clipboard their way around the scene and scrape the remains of dumbassery off the road, so the decent may make haste.  Thus we must find a faster solution to this slow Zamboni-ing of the burnt matter and debris.  Keep dreaming...   In well over 7000 years of human government, it is the only human institution that actually slows with maturity. 

No there will be no speedy reforms in this arena, there will not be any less cigarettes held or donuts consumed in this fight.  Don't forget, this is government, and state government at that you have to think glacial!  The only solution, unfortunately is to think like the poor gened democratic masters we are all slaves to.  We must approach this like a wolf in sheep's clothing, we must don our dummy hats and think government!  The dark side of the force seeketh must we.

So here is my plan, in order to slow or stop or at least bring a sense of fear to the lackluster drivers out there, (the ones that evolution has so far missed) that threaten us all with a 3 hour commute:  We hit them all where it hurts, that's right, in the pocketbook with a massive new tax!  Yes democrats everywhere are squirming with giddy happiness!  Yes!  Whenever you cause a wreck that falls between the hours of 05:00-09:00 or 14:00-19:00 you are hit with a horrific 500 dollar a half hour that traffic is restricted.  If you are a commercial vehicle and are causing multiple delays your company sponsor is beatdown with a 15,000 dollar an hour fine/tax each and every hour it costs to clean your remains off the road.

I know it seems crazy for a libertarian/anarchist purebred psycho such as myself to propose such legislation, but I'm just being honest about our current situation.  Government already has us all by the short and curlies, the only thing that will even come close to fixing traffic is to instill such fear into each and every motorist on the road with certain financial doom.  Oh the money you ask, it is silly to assign it to any one cause or justify the spending in any way, I'm quite sure it will go to some sort of boxed fan giveaway or another rec center behind turner field.  This system is not about building up a tax coffer it is merely a fine/terror system to live in the mind of each and every pre-darwinized driver out there that does millions of dollars in damage daily to our economies through their careless actions.

Related:

A driving lesson by me! 

Starbucks 3 hour closing not long enough...

This news story about the cult of Starbucks closing for three hours today reminds me of my deal breaker encounter there last year.  I think this correction is way overdue, they need much more than a silly little training time out.  Starbucks has been crashing hard as of late, the number one complaint are stuffy, snooty coffee servers, they are hemorrhaging cash.  Honestly with the economy tightening up people are looking at 6.00 cup of coffee served by a real asshole as just not that valuable to daily life, I know I have never been back, after I was nearly physically attacked by a barrista at the starbucks on 14th street in Atlanta.

An excerpt from the day that killed starbucks:

I have worked since I was 12 years old, I have dug ditches, mowed lawns, worked electrical/construction, retail.  I have never in my life seen someone behave in such an aggressive and self righteous way in a retail setting.  I firmly believe if you choose to serve the public in an industry such as that you have to keep a certain personality profile.  The only words out of your mouth should be Yes sir, No sir, Thank you, You're welcome.  Thats it!  Keep your shitty day to yourself, your stupid collegey immature politics to yourself, if you are having trouble with your boyfriend I don't give a shit.  Just because you are behind a counter and now wearing the golden crown "Barrista" doesn't give you a pass to assholery.  You pour coffee into cups, add sugary syrup and swish it around a bit, wow you truly have transcended the man-god barrier.  The reality is you are making $8.00 an hour and really are about 1/8th better than a fry cook so buck up and shut up. Continued...

I drove I blogged, 10,000 times!

Despite the recession the media is hell bent on creating, I have been excessively busy...  Not much blogging at all mostly driving!  That is where the current action is!  In fact a milestone of sorts happened just yesterday.  As completely OCD as this sounds my little mobile experiment that I call driving and blogging had it's 10,000th post. 

(There is a web based phone down there somewhere)

As insane as it sounds to document every few hours of my life via web, it has actually been quite rewarding.  I have created a living diary of pictures over the last year.  This web experiment has proven that by doing so, I actually recall events more clearly and can place my feelings and thoughts more accurately just by checking the site.  I guess I will continue you to blog in this most obsessive of ways, it has almost become normal at this point.  How long can this unlimited bandwidth hold out?

The massive archive follows, this has certainly crashed most machines under 2GB of ram, nice:

http://www.lastfreeman.com/driving_and_blogging/archives.html

Spelunking Tevas

The lake levels in Georgia are so low due to the drought situation that all sorts of things are coming to light.  Original tree stumps from the demolition that began many of these army engineered lakes are seeing the sun for the first time in 50 years.  It feels almost like an alien landscape in some places where the water has been concealing the land below.

(low lake levels linger!)

I have been visiting lake Alatoona my entire life.  Swimming and doing all the normal quirky kid stuff.  I have seen many lake level changes over the years as the Army corps of engineers ultimately decides the water pool levels of this lake.  Never has the lake been this low, and scouting around its perimeter leads to some pretty interesting discoveries.

Today while out with my brother and our lady friends, we discovered a cave.  Deeply embedded in the side of a high outcropping peninsula.  Normally this huge opening would be 20 feet or so underwater but today it was seeing the sun just like the rest of us.  I really can't say enough about the new Teva trekking flip flops.  With the heavy lug soles, and sticky rubber bottoms they are truly extreme flip flopping required gear.  I have used mine to the point of them being only allowed in the garage due to their bear ass smell and mud caking.  Bravo Teva for another high end flip flop!

(Cave entrance flip flop offroad mode enabled)

The cave's opening now root filled and cracking was almost a temptation.  When looking inside you could see at least 30 feet in, with a deep turn downward.  When my brother stood on a steep upper ridge the entire cave face began to fall inward.  Showing its unstable nature right away was enough to persuade me from any attempts at discovery.

There is something really child-like and fun about discovering something as dark and mysterious as a cave.  It speaks directly to my sense of adventure and love of the unknown.  Of course there is nothing like half a ton of crumbling earth coming down in front of you, to snap you back and leave the spelunking to your in game character.  Their is no save point in real life, best leave the heavy adventuring to my online counterparts...

Caving and blogging:

http://www.lastfreeman.com/driving_and_blogging/2008/01/27/index.html

New Years 2008 Blow out review!

New years is all about family, drinking and blowing up big stuff.  This year was no different in fact I would say it was by the far the explosionest, eatingest, familiest one yet!  We found ourselves at the family retreat our beautifully renovated lake cabin overlooking Allatoona lake.  Right away there was surprise and intrigue as we pulled up and realized that as usual my father the "master of surprise" had done it again.  Parked out front was a brand new Club Car electric golf cart!!  Now we could tear around the lake in style with a powerful golf cart for all our adventuring needs.  It was dark, my brother and I had already consumed a half gallon of Rogue's finest, what's left to do but go for a night ride!

Later after some really tasty dinner treats including buffaloed oysters, coconut shrimp, seafood dip, shrimp n' grits and numerous others, it was time for the fireworks setup.  My brother and I scouted around into the night, it was of course another excuse to ride around in the golf cart at high speeds under the influence, a pleasure indeed!  At one point scaling an incline at high speed ejected me from the cart as it almost tipped as my leg hit the safety bar I cracked my Sidekick III into certain doom.  This is what the holidays are all about dumb drunk tomfoolery with my brother.  No one remembers the sitting around the tree drinking egg nog crap, it's the scars you cherish...

Once we decided on a drop zone for the mortars it was just a matter of laying them out and orienting the fuses in the same direction.  Some of the cake boxes this year we blew up were:  boys toys, one perfect thing, saturn missile 750, wild cactus, and a few other smaller variants of the saturn family.  I will say the "boys toys" while very gay in title was interesting in performance.  It was a very different multi stage mortar system with lots of fanning small rounds.  They fired quickly and sequentially in a fan pattern and made a sound resembling a motor scooter.  Lots of color and a sky full of streamers.  I think this is an interesting concept in box mortars, a quiet firework based on color!

We all cheered in the new year at the stroke of 12:00AM.  With my dad's toast to the greatest family in the world I truly think 2008 will be a wonderful year full of joy and wonder!

Videos New years 2008

A few New Years eve videos:

http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=B7636B25930B7DE1